Titan Peeler: Infomercial Review

I'm always fascinated by the names they give to products that are sold on those late-night infomercials. For instance, do you remember the GINSU KNIFE? I'm positive that no American knows what 'ginsu" means, but just think it sounds Japanese. And for some reason, maybe pertaining to samurais and ninjas, we think of sharp blades when we think of Ginsus. There was also the Veg-a-Matic, which did indeed slice vegetables, but since it was totally hand-powered, there was nothing automatic about it.

And now we have the Titan Peeler. "Titan" means "giant; big and powerful." So of course, one of the selling points of Titan Peeler is that it's so....SMALL and easy-to-handle. Makes perfect sense in infomercial-land.

Watch Video

This is one of several infomercial items I have personally bought. I did it because I'm lazy and Titan Peeler does a great job of slicing and peeling things in considerably less time. But I bought it before I saw the commercial. Good thing, because the commercial would not have caused me to buy.

For starters, I'm insulted by their having this guy with an Australian accent promoting the product. In fact, more and more people think that British or Australian accents are good for selling food products. Am I, because I'm American, considered inept in the kitchen? (I'm a total expert with the microwave).

But the one part of the commercial that I like is the question that opens it: "Do you want to peel and slice vegetables in an instant?" To which I reply, "No, I don't want to peel and slice them at all."

But since NOT peeling them is not an option, doing it faster is better than nothing. And that's why I love the Titan Peeler. Because laziness is my curse.

Go To Official Site

Power Juicer Infomercial Review

I have had a juicer in the past and let me tell you, there are a whole lot of ways to make a nasty drink. I have seen several different infomercials for juicers in my day and all of them talk of the healthy and “Easy” way to get your days essential vitamins and minerals. I do agree with the healthy part. I don’t believe that just because of making my own juice I am going to be the 80 year old man running down the beach with a boogie board, but at least I wont be spending a lot of money on sugar filled drinks, however delicious they are.

Watch Video

Back to the point though. The most recent infomercial that I have seen related to juicers is the Power Juicer with its new sleek looking Stainless steel. The majority of the infomercial was concentrating on the making of juice and its health benefits. Great I say. That’s the reason I ever bought one. However, the one thing that they briefly touched on was the clean up. “Clean up is a breeze” they allege. Well, maybe I am just doing it wrong. You can’t just rinse it off. You have to wash it; otherwise it smells really bad in a few days. I made that mistake, and putting it in the dishwasher is exactly easy to do either.

Any who, I definitely recommend this product to anybody and everybody, especially parents with young kids. All too often parents are filling their children with sugar, and by making your own juice, at least your kids will be healthier.

Go To Official Store

ZOOM MARINATOR: Infomercial Review

My wife hates it when I'm in the kitchen when she's trying to cook. I'm the guy running my fingers into the cookie dough, sampling the chili while it's still in the pan, and sneaking a deviled egg while she's not looking.

So here's my question: if women like my wife hate us being in the kitchen while they're cooking,why do they order so many fun devices that make guys like me want to play with them? Remember the Veg-O-Matic? It never worked, but it sure was a lot of fun!

Watch Video

And now my wife bought the Zoom Marinator. This is a device with so many fun things to play with. It keeps things fresh by offering this pump that you push in and out to suck out all the air. I found myself wanting to "freshenize" things just to use the pump. Hey, here's some water! Let's keep it fresh! My wife was not impressed.

Then there's the contraption that you push down on top of your meat or vegetables that injects the food with whatever you want injected...."fifty flavor pins," according to Chef Tony. I think this was the last straw for my wife. She did not appreciate the baked potatoes injected with hot sauce. Oh well.

By the way, who is this Chef Tony guy in the commercial anyway? He looks like the greasy chef who works at every truckstop diner you've ever seen. Makes good looking food, though--if he in fact made the food in the commercial.

I'm glad my wife ordered ZOOM MARINATOR (even if they did misspell "marinater"). It's one of the best ways for guys like me to have fun in the kitchen.

Go To Official Site

Wow Storage Infomercial Review

Very rarely do I see an infomercial that makes me tilt my head to the side and say “Dang, that’s a good idea.” It’s so rare in fact that I don’t think it has ever happened to me. What could this incredible invention be you ask that makes the guy who loves to watch infomercials passionate enough to describe his reaction to the infomercial itself? Could it be an in home money machine, or a food replicator (for you star trek people), the cure to cancer (I don’t think they would make an infomercial for that) or maybe a hologram (again for the trekkies)? The answer is no, to all of those. The incredible invention is actually some Tupper ware style containers (I know not as exciting as you thought). They are called the Wow Storage system and it’s actually kind of cool. So cool in fact that I don’t even have anything witty or bad to say about them.

Watch Video

They are basically your average Tupper ware style containers that both sides of it can act as a bottom or a top. If you can wrap your head around that without a visual, then I salute you but I don’t think that I can explain it properly or due it justice describing it here so I suggest that you go and watch the infomercial for your self. Asseenontvvideos.com and the product is Wow Storage. Enjoy.

Go To Official Site

Pancake Puffs: Infomercial Review

Pancake Puffs: Infomercial Review

As soon as I heard the name for the product advertised on a commercial the other day, I knew I'd be buying it. After all, how could you NOT buy something with a cool name like “Pancake Puffs”? Heck, I thought it was tissue paper with a pancake design and I was ready to buy.

Turns out, Pancake Puffs is a kitchen device for making my favorite thing: Food. So you can make these muffin-shaped “pancakes” with Pancake Puffs. And by the way, in my part of the world, we had a different name for pancakes shaped like muffins; we called them “muffins.”

Same with the pizza-flavored pancake puffs they show. We call those “pizza rolls.” But let's not quibble over semantics. The food all looks delicious and easy to make.

I could perhaps do without the 50 “flipping sticks.” If you haven't seen the commercial, visualize a toothpick Now visualize it about three times the length. That's a “flipping stick.”

As much as I want Pancake Puffs, I don't know if my wife will agree. If you see the commercial, you'll understand. Regular pancakes stack nice and neat...until you add syrup, at which time syrup gets over everything. At least, when I'm eating them, it does. Now imagine a slob like me stacking ROUND pancakes up pyramid style, with gooey syrup dripping all the way down. Are you seeing the mess in your mind? I know my wife is.

So I can't count on her to buy me Pancake Puffs. For that reason, let the call go forth: if you want to buy me something for Christmas, I love pancakes. And muffins. And pancake-muffins,even.

Zasshu Knife: Infomercial Review

Zasshu Knife: Infomercial Review

Haven't seen enough knives on late-night infomercials? Here's another for you. I saw one today on the Zasshu Knife. I thought immediately it's an interesting knife, and then I thought to myself that I see too many knives all the time on TV, with everyone always saying their knives are better.

Then I saw what they say other knives do to vegetables and fruit. They always show some sort of squished fruit of vegetable. I wish I could go to where they shoot these commercials because I wanna see the floor plan and how big these kitchens actually are. Who on earth would ever hold up celery like that and chop it. I would be afraid of chopping my hand off or cutting a finger. That knife seems pretty sharp and probably would go right through my finger and bone.

See, they should put the commercials on the food network or something and kinda aim them toward the professional chefs and cooks out there, because the regular American worker I know doesn't know how to handle a knife that sharp. A lot of people I know would rub their finger down it just to see if it's really that sharp, only to get a serious cut. Ok, I also would rub my finger down it just to see how sharp it is.

My wife is convinced she needs a Zasshu Knife now (She was convinced several years back that she needed one of those knives that cuts through cinderblocks, because as far as she knew, we didn't yet have a knife that could cut through cinder blocks).

The Zasshu announcer tells you it's less than 40 dollars. Yup, $39.99. One whole penny less. And by the time you pay shipping and handling it's actually over 40 dollars.

One last thing puzzles me: Why on earth would you compare this to samuraii swords? It's only a knife, people, not intended to kill anyone. Are there a lot of martial arts experts who feel their weapons are inferior and plan to buy a kitchen knife instead?
Hmm, on second thought, not a bad idea. Sign me up.

Visit the official Zasshu Knife website for more information or to purchase Zasshu Knife.

Perfect Brownie: Infomercial Review

Perfect Brownie - Infomercial Review

You know what’s the best thing to make a guy hungry? Just throw into his football game a commercial about brownies. Yep, as you can guess, on came a brownie commercial in the middle of the game today. Actually it's a commercial for a device called Perfect Brownie. First thought out in my head was the hunger going to my stomach. The second thought was how good those brownies looked.

To be honest, I have never had a problem with a knife when it comes to cutting the brownies up. The secret is you have to cut them up when they first come out of the oven while they are still warm. Well I guess some stay at home soccer mom was bored one day and came up with an idea to put this divider in a baking pan so that the brownies are already cut evenly while baking. If that woman had never let them get hard in the first place, they wouldn't have gotten stuck. Amateurs! And what is up with that kitchen where the little girl is throwing her hands up, looks like one of those kitchens you find on a cooking show of some sort. Just perfect for TV, I guess.
need to be a serving tray? Looks kinda weird if you ask me. Who would ever compare ice cube trays to making brownies; come on people one is cold and one is hot. Again this commercial made me so hungry I had to ask the wife to go make some brownies. I wonder where they make these commercials cause I don't know of that many kitchens with the room and space I see on this commercial. I wish I had a kitchen that big. When I saw the nonstick pan stuff I thought about every other piece of non stick stuff I had and just remembered how it only worked a few times and was not worth it anymore.

Okay Perfect Brownie, you win. You have me drooling so much for those luscious treats, I'm ordering. But can you rush it right over-as in five minutes from now? I'm about to have a brownie fit.

Visit the official Perfect Brownie website for more information or to purchase Perfect Brownie.

QUICKSHINE: Infomercial Review

QUICKSHINE: Infomercial Review

Dear QUICKSHINE folks:

My wife and I made a trip to CVS the other day after seeing your QUICKSHINE product advertised on TV. She loves the floor shine kit, but a few things have me worried, so I thought I'd share them with you.

First, you asked "Wouldn't you like to have a shiny clean floor that lasts for months?" We just put in a new floor in the kitchen two weeks ago, and I'd much rather have the floor last for years instead of months. Do you think this is possible? Or am I being greedy? My wife says she thinks you mean "wouldn't you like to have a shine that lasts for months," but I told her if you said "a floor that lasts for months," that must be what you meant.

She's also going to use QuickShine on the dining room floor, but to be honest, the old floor was cruddy looking. So when you say QuickShine "restores" the floor, is it too much to hope it doesn't restore it TOO well? I kind of like the new look; not much about the old one I want restored.

You said we should use your blue pad to clean and the green to shine. I'm color blind. What happens if I use the wrong pad? Is it dangerous to shine before I clean? Am I in danger of shining our dirt?

I am happy that you pointed out that the mop pads are reusable. It would have been a shame if you'd created the first mop that has to be discarded after every use. That could get quite costly.

Speaking of cost, you said QuickShine is "guaranteed or your money back." I don't understand this. Does this mean that if the product is NOT guaranteed, I get my money back? Wouldn't that, then, be a guarantee...and since there is a guarantee, wouldn't that mean I won't get my money back? I need some clarification here.

Finally, the thing I'm most concerned about is that, even though you told me I could pick up QuickShine at CVS, you also urged me to call now because "operators are standing by." I do hope you've told them to sit down by now, because I've gotten my QuickShine elsewhere. Please let them take a coffee break and then take care of someone else.

Yours truly,

Kelly